9/27/2022 0 Comments Lance for Congress! As November 8th approaches, Lance's opponents beat around the bush while Lance makes no bones about where he stands on the issues. If elected, he promises to sink his teeth into the country’s problems: Once in Congress, he’ll take a bite out of crime. Safety for the nation’s most vulnerable is a major issue for Lance. He has a bone to pick with abusers. If elected, Lance will insist on stricter enforcement of leash laws in public places. He’s tired of seeing dogs accompanied by unrestrained humans. (In the photo above) Lance reacts to his opponent’s attack ad in the newspaper. Lance will listen to his constituents. He’s all ears. Illegal immigration? Who better to resolve that issue than a border collie? Lance will help the homeless because he’s been there himself. This country’s adversaries will learn to take Lance seriously. Lance’s bite is far worse than his bark. Lance will tackle the nation's problems with dogged determination. Is Lance qualified to serve in Congress? Let’s just say he’s never bitten off more than he can chew. Lance promises not to run for reelection. After his first term, he’ll be dog gone. Having lived in uncertainty for the first ten years of his life, Lance knows the importance of protecting Social Security. Lance will fight discrimination. Intolerance really ticks him off. Jobs going overseas? If elected, Lance will retrieve them. Lance would never lead this country down the wrong path. (In the photo below) Here’s Lance with a potential constituent. Even felines fancy Lance—he’s the cat’s meow. Vote Lance in 2022!
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Author Biography
Walter Stoffel is a substance abuse counselor and GED teacher in correctional facilities. When not behind bars, he likes to read, travel, work out and watch bad movies. Major accomplishment : He entered a 26.2-mile marathon following hip replacement surgery and finished—dead last. The author currently lives with his wife Clara, their dog Buddy (another rescue), and cat Winky (yet another rescue).
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